ever have one of those days where you kind of question if your life can get any less normal? Yea well that's exactly the kind of night I'm having. My uncle's doing a little better, he might be able to go home tomorrow but idk I still feel really bad because I haven't visited him in the hospital but idk if my parents want me to. It was so sad and scary today cuz my grandma was telling us that when he first went in when his brain was hemoraging and he was all confused and everything that he like clung to susie and asked her was was goign to happen and was really scared and stuff. And I mean that's totally understandable but it's just so scary to see/hear about this person that you've always seen as so strong and a role model so helpless and scared. It's really hard for me. And then I started questioning all this family stuff (idk how to explain it sry) like I always just took for ggranted that my family would be always be there to support me and I'd always love them and always be included but today when my cousin called me and told me my aunt uninvited him to thanksgiving it really made me wonder about the importance of family and how much it really means to people in my family and it made me hate my aunt, i mean i've never felt any real care for her except that my uncle would be devastated if something happened to her but today i really felt like I hated her. Idk i'm just in a weird mood. missing my sister too. I havent seen her in months and really want to. But she'll be home for xmas so that'll be kewl. alright well that's about all I've got, add more later maybe.

~MS

We began,
In vibrant colors,
But one of the things you said
And i dread it.
That everything turns grey,
This is where i stray
I, I want so badly,
To say that these things dont exist anymore.
-Goapele "things don't exist"